Season Obituaries - 8th Place — Protector Of The League

(Photo from a simpler time when Ken wasn't undermining the work I put into this league).

Gurley’s Gone (4-9):

Overview:

Coming in 8th place with a record of 4-9 and 1,433.5 points scored (good for 8th) is Gurley’s Gone, owned and managed by Ken Peabody. (Formerly Gurley Gone Wild).

What Went Right:

The last four weeks of the season went really well for Ken and we saw him post a 3-1 record over the last month. He went from 1-8 and the certain Gabriel to 4-9 and the second man out of the playoffs. Over that time frame he scored 485.1 total points, which is good for an average of about 120. He wasn’t playing poor teams during that time either, all four of the teams he played are in the playoffs. He was able to beat Lamone (1st seed), Tieg (4th seed) and Guy (6th seed). Ken actually went 4-3 over his last 7 games, so it was a strong finish after a disastrous start.

What Went Wrong:

As I just mentioned, the first 6 weeks of Ken’s season were an UNMITIGATED DISASTER. He went 0-6 during that time and it sank his season like Battleship. He failed to put up 100 in 3 of his games, and put up 108 or fewer in 5 of them. His highest score was the 116 he put up in week 3, when Tieg beat him 116-152. He put up just 595 points during this time, which is baddddd mmkay.

Meanwhile, Ken’s opponents put up 755 in the same time frame, or 160 more than he scored. As you can imagine, he was getting blown out. The closest margin of loss was 12, his week 2 matchup to yours truly (97-85). Aside from that, the margin of loss in his other 5 games averaged 30 points. He just got smoked in those games.

Best Owner Move:

I guess I’ll say the three trades Ken made. Even though it didn’t look like it at the time, Ken ended up getting the best player in every trade he made. The first trade was between myself and Ken. I traded Spencer Ware and Maclin for Edelman and Lacy. Maclin sniffs bike seats, but Spencer Ware is currently the 16th highest scoring RB. Meanwhile, Edelman is the 26th ranked WR and Lacy hasn’t played since week 5. Even though it wasn’t a major move for either of us, Ken still got the best player in the deal.

The next trade was a big one between Ken and Dylan. Ken gave up Todd Gurley, Jeremy Hill and Sammy Watkins for Mark Ingram, Christine Michael and Demaryius Thomas. Again, no one really won big on this but Ken got the best player in the deal. Mark Ingram is the highest ranked RB of those 4 at RB14. Demaryius Thomas is also having a decent year, ranked as WR22. Meanwhile, Gurley is RB17 and Hill is RB20.

The last trade created trade gate. Even though I don’t want to talk about it, I’ll cover it quickly here. Ken gave up Kirk Cousins and Allen Hurns, while Tieg gave up Big Ben and Terrance West. RBs are more valuable than QBs in our league, so Ken automatically got a better deal. West just scored 22 points this last week and sits as the 21st scoring RB. Meanwhile, Hurns didn’t play and Kirk Cousins put up one of his lowest totals of the year. Advantage Ken I guess.

(Side bar: I don’t care that Ken may have won this trade. Non-playoff teams shouldn’t trade with playoff teams that late in the season. Bad for business, bad for everyone.)

Worst Owner Move:

Drafting Eddie Lacy in the second round was Ken’s worst owner move of the year. He drafted Lacy at #16, when Lacy’s ESPN ADP was 25. TWENTY FIVE. This information is available to the public, but Ken took him a full round before his average draft position. I know Ken did it half out of spite for last year, but it was a terrible decision.

Lacy put up just 18 combined points in his first two games before Ken traded him away. The worst part is the other guys Ken could have had in the second round. The next four picks were Mark Ingram (RB14), Jordy Nelson (WR5), LeSean McCoy (RB5) and Dez Bryant (WR32). Overall just a poor decision by the Peabs. He’ll probably take him in the third round next year.

Historical/Pop Culture/Literary Comparison:

Benedict Arnold, the infamous turncoat of the Revolutionary War (Born 1741, Died 1801). Ken has many similarities to Benedict Ahhhnold so let’s look at a few.

First - the Continental Congress owed Arnold a lot of money, which was the main cause of Arnold’s dissatisfaction. The Colonies were basically bankrupt during the war, so Congress was unable to pay Arnold for his services. Good ole Benedict didn’t understand this or think it was fair. Similarly, Ken claimed he was not fully reimbursed for expenses incurred during the Austin Trip. He didn’t understand it or think it was far. One of the major reasons Arnold decided to switch sides was because the British promised to pay him a ton of money. I bet Tieg paid Ken in some way, which caused the trade.

Second – Arnold arguably never got the respect he deserved as a General. He was routinely passed over for promotions despite the fact that he was a strong tactician and his men loved him. Many historians attribute the victories at Saratoga to Benedict Arnold, even though General Horatio Gates took credit for them (The victories at Saratoga were huge for the war effort and were a main selling point to the French when we asked for their support). Likewise, Ken often did not get credit for his managerial acumen. You could actually argue that he won in all three of his trades this year (see above). Still, no one gives him credit.

Third - Benedict Arnold was trusted by General George Washington and they knew each other well. The leader of the Continental Army took Arnold’s betrayal personally and was enraged when it happened. This is similar to how Ken was a close friend of the Commissioner until he betrayed the league. I took it as a personal betrayal when Ken made the trade. Partially because I could play Tieg in the playoffs*, but also because it was just bad business. A trade between the 1 seed and 10 seed is just bad business. (*I am playing Tieg in the playoffs)

Fourth - the backlash of Arnold switching sides was brutal from a PR perspective. The British used the defection as propaganda, saying that the American cause must be in trouble if one of their generals was switching sides. Similarly, Keetz used the trade as propaganda to say the season was tarnished.

Lastly - Arnold got the money he so desperately wanted (see #1), but he never got the respect he desired. Even though he betrayed the Colonials and joined the British Army, none of the British actually liked him. They distrusted him due to the fact that he was a traitor (duh) and the British lost one of their best officers (Major General John Andre) when Arnold switched sides. Likewise, Ken avoided the Gabriel, but he still draws ire from the rest of the league. Even though he broke bread with Tieg, Pure Taige will still distrust Ken.

Benedict Arnold was a complex and misunderstood man, kinda like Ken. Yes, he betrayed his country and fellow soldiers, but he had his reasons. Just like when Ken betrayed 8 members of this league, he had his reasons. By the same token, Arnold didn’t think he did anything wrong. He thought he had been wronged and was doing what was his right. Ken felt the exact same way – he didn’t see anything wrong with what he did. Unfortunately for him, no one else sees it that way.

Commissioner’s Prediction:

I say Ken goes 7-6, makes the playoffs and loses in the first round. His team looks pretty good, but I don’t think he has enough to get him over the top. He is talented, but Gurley plays in one of the worst offenses in football. The other teams are just gonna pull the Madden08 move and set up for a field goal block formation every time the Rams have the ball. Eddie Lacy is supposed to be back, but do we know for sure? There are some other questions up and down his lineup and ultimately, I just don’t think he has the star power that some of our other teams do. Still, should be a playoff bound team.

Damn, another miss. The fact I predicted Ken to go to the playoffs is interesting, but he didn’t mess up my bracket too badly (first round exit). Sitting at 1 for 3 right now, 33% clip. That’s good for three point shooting but not for season predictions, let’s pick it up.

Ultimately my prediction was wrong because his first four picks didn’t work out. Ken has to be the only person who does not have one of his first four draft picks on his team at year end. That's actually a ridiculous stat. Gurley, Lacy, Watkins and Edelman are all off Ken's team. Anyway, I thought Gurley would be a top 10 back and I thought Lacy would recover his old form (he did before he got injured). I also didn’t think Sammy Watkins would miss the whole season. I fudged this one, put too much faith in Ken.

Final Notes:

Congratulations Peabs, you made a nice comeback towards the end of the season. Winning 3 of your last 4 games isn’t an easy thing to do and ultimately you finished outside of the bottom two. I really wish you hadn’t made that trade though. It definitely put a black mark on the season for me and made me lose a little faith in humanity. I figured there were some unwritten rules in this league, some gentleman’s rules if you will. I guess I was wrong and I have to monitor everything in this league. Oh well, that’s what the Commish gets for trying. Being the Commish, such a thankless job.

I have no idea what to expect for Ken next year. His drafting skills are horrible, no doubt about that. His trading skills are upper tier though, so that’s a beacon of hope. His FA skills are up and down, mixed results there. I’d say he’s competitive next year, but we’ll have to wait 10 months to find out.