GW Bush League - Week 8 (Part 2)

Bud Light n the Dilly Dilly’s: (5-3)

What I Said: Let’s start with Christian McCaffrey who was the most hyped rookie of the 2017 draft class…. As a result he was a 3rd round pick in most drafts – the 24th overall pick in our league. So what has the 24th overall pick done? Is 21 carries for 57 yards, 9 catches for 72 yards and no TDs good?........ As you can tell, I’m pretty down on him. I’ll continue to be down – I think this is real. While McCaffrey may have some big games this year, I think the 8-12 point range is the best you can expect. The Panthers offense stinks and will continue to bring him down.

Result: This one is kinda tough. On one hand, McCaffrey is RB15 in our league’s scoring. On the other hand, he only has 2 games with more than 14 points and has only scored 2 TDs all year. He’s been horrible on the ground, but has redeemed himself due to absurd usage in the passing game. So was I right? I said he’d finish with 8-12 points every week. He’s finished inside that range 3 of the 6 games since then. The other three were 13.9, 19 and his season high of 21. While he’s been more than serviceable, I think we can all agree he was a let-down – and not worth the 24th overall pick. Still, a top 15 RB is a top 15 RB. I was kinda generous with the Part 1 predictions, so I’ll give myself half a point here. Starting off .5 for 1.

What I Said: Jordan Howard is another young RB who received a lot of hype this offseason. Howard started off pretty well, scoring 16.7 points in the first half of his week 1 game. Then he got injured and Tarik Cohen came in and ruined everything. While he didn’t play in the second half of Week 1, Week 2 was especially bad - if it wasn’t for our points per carry rule he woulda had .7 points. TERRIBLE. I’m extremely down on Jordan Howard going forward, so I think week 2 was real.

Result: Brutal call here, couldn’t have been more wrong. Since I wrote that, Howard has gone for 36.7, 16.9, 11, 28, 10 and 21 points. He’s received 23 carries per game and has ran really well – despite the fact teams know they are going to run the ball every play. Overall he’s been RB8 and should be solid going forward. Slow start at .5 for 2.

What I Said:  Last but not least: Terrance West. West is currently RB #15 after being selected as the 104th player in our draft. Not bad right? He’s scored 30 points so far - 17 in week 1 and 13 in week 2. He’s getting about 15 touches a game and it appears as though he’s their goal-line back. So will this continue? Will Terrance West be a steal? No, this is a fugazi. I think his production so far is fake.

Result: Back on track here, couldn’t have been more right about this. Since Week 2, West has combined for 4 points and rings in at RB66. Injuries have played a role – he hasn’t played since Week 5 – but I was still right here. Terrance West just isn’t that good and last year was a fluke – of course Tieg had him. 1.5 for 3.

“Jakey-Jakey” Big Mistakey: 1-7

What I Said: Let’s start with Mike Gillislee of the Patriots. When Gillislee was signed it was expected he would take the Legarrette Blount role. The 18 TDs and 1,100 rushing yards were the dream scenario, but it was widely accepted he’d rush for at least 10 touchdowns. Those expectations have been met and through two weeks he’s been great. While he’s on pace to fall short of the 1,100 yards, he’s also on pace to shatter the TD total Blount put up (on-pace for 36). So is this real or is this fake? Overall I think Gillislee is for real and will continue to produce for Guy’s team.

Result: Insert over-used Homer Simpson gif here…

Gillislee has been an unmitigated disaster since Week 2 and currently resides on the waiver wire. In the past 6 weeks, he’s fumbled, taken a trip to the Belichick fumblehouse (re: doghouse), lost his job to Dion Lewis and been dropped by just about every fantasy team who drafted him. He hasn’t scored a single TD in those weeks and the Pats backfield is the definition of running-back-by-committee. 1.5 for 4 here.

What I Said:  Golden Tate is another player I wanted to look at. He’s one of the players who was good one game this year and sucked in the other. In Week 1 he scored 18.8 points on 10 catches for 107 yards. In week 2 he scored 4.5 points on 4 catches for 25 yards. So which is real and which is fake? Summing it up, I think Week 2 was a fugazi. I think the Week 1 stat line is closer to what we can expect.

Result: This one has definitely been up and down, just like Golden Tate’s season. Since Week 2 he’s gone for 16.3, 4.8, 7.3, 19.1, BYE and 10.1. Ultimately he’s had two great weeks, two awful weeks and one decent week. So how do we call this? I initially said he’d be closer to the 18.8 he put up in Week 1 than the 4.5 he put up in Week 2. Over the last 5 games he’s averaged 11.52 per game. The split between the high is 7.28 points (18.8 – 11.52) while the split between the low is 7.02 points (11.52-4.5). Are you fucking kidding me? Calling bullshit here. No one reads Guy’s sections and I’m 99% sure he doesn’t read them, so I’m giving this to myself. I said Tate would be good and any receiver who averages 11.5 points per game is okay by me. That brings me to 2.5 for 5.

What I Said: Finally I want to examine Marcus Mariota. The Titans QB was a very popular pick this year and Guy chose him to be his starter. In Week 1 Mariota looked like a stud when he scored 21 points against the Raiders. In Week 2 Mariota looked like a 10th round pick when he put up 15 against the Jaguars. Overall he sits at QB13, which is pretty mediocre. In our ten man league, it’s technically not even good enough to be a starter. So what should be expect from Mariota this year? Honestly I think QB13 is about right and this is real. While I like Mariota personally, I just don’t see him breaking the top 10 of QB scoring based on game flow and team strategy.

Result: Mariota is currently QB26. I can say I was right because I said Mariota wouldn’t be a top 10 QB. He’s far from it at #26. That’s kinda misleading though – he missed a game and has had his bye. So how about on a points per game basis? He’s got about 18 points per game, which definitely looks better than the QB26 rating. On that basis he’s still outside of the top 10 though – behind Smith, Deshaun, Carson Wentz, TB12, Russel Wilson, Dak, Cam, Kurt Cousins, McCown and Brees. I said he’d finish outside the top 10 and he is outside of the top 10 no matter how you look at it. 3.5 for 6.

THE STAR OF LARRY DAVID JOHNSON: 2-6

What I Said: I mentioned my frustration with the sorry-ass-Amari Cooper when we looked at Crabtree, so I’m going to examine him here as well. Amari was the first pick of the 3rd round in our draft and it was widely expected that he’d break out in his third year with the Raiders. I started to believe that in Week 1 when he had 15 points and a TD, but my beliefs were shattered when he put up 5.3 points in Week 2. So is this Amari Cooper? Is he really gonna finish as WR22? Sadly, I think so. Cooper will have some good weeks, but he’s going to be somewhat of a disappointment and he’ll have these really poor weeks that just kill you.

Result: Right again here Commish. Amari Cooper has been one of the biggest busts in fantasy this year and everything I’ve said has been true. He’s had some good weeks - true. He’ll be a disappointment - true. He’ll have poor weeks that just kill you - true. Even with a 43 point game on his resume he’s still outside of the top 15 at WR. The 43 points are more than half of the 81 he’s scored all season. If you take that one big game out, he’s averaging just over 5 points per game. To make matters worse, most people didn’t even start him that game. 4.5 for 7 on the day.

What I Said: From the first pick in the 3rd round to the last pick in the 2nd round – let’s talk about Brandin Cooks. The Patriots spent a 1st round pick on Cooks and it was expected that he’d produce at a high level. At the very least he’d finish as a top 15 WR like he has the last two years. Unfortunately for Cooks owners, he’s been booty so far. BOOTY Cooks has just 5 catches for 125 yards and 16 fantasy points through two games. Cooks currently sits as WR38, which obviously sucks. That being said there’s no way he finishes this poorly. He finished as WR10 last year and WR12 the year before. All in all I think he’s underperformed and will break out soon.

Result: Go Commish Go. Cooks currently sits at WR5 in our scoring and has clearly shown the early season slump was just that – a slump. He’ll be a big contributor for Frader once he comes back from his bye. 5.5 for 8.

What I Said: This is a random one, but I’m gonna look at Hunter Henry. Frader has Jordan Reed, but he’s already banged up and hasn’t done shit (14 points in 2 games). Henry is actually in Frader’s lineup right now, so let’s see what his deal is. In week 1, Henry went without a catch or a target. In Week 2, he caught all 7 of his targets for 84 yards. Which one was real and which one was fake? I think Week 2 was more indicative than Week 1. While I’m not sure if Frader will actually use Henry over Jordan Reed at TE, I think Henry will be a solid TE option going forward.

Result: Henry is currently TE11, which I think falls under “a solid TE option” (great analysis). Since Week 2 he’s scored 2 touchdowns in 6 games and has put up 8.6 or more points in all but 2 of those games. While those numbers aren’t great, the bar was set very low. Tight Ends suck in fantasy football and you could do a lot worse than Hunter Henry. Just to make it fair, I’ll give myself another half point here. Ended 6 for 9 on the day (I obviously did that on purpose comeon man).

 (TOTAL STANDINGS: 9 teams * 3 per = 27. I went 19-8 on the 27 predictions, or about 70%. Not bad, that's a hell of a lot higher than Matthew Berry shoots these days)

JABAAL PAP SHMEARD: 5-3

Lamone was interviewed the week these were done and as a result, I did not look at any of his players. This is actually perfect because Lamone was the person most impacted by the NFL trade deadline. In honor of that, let’s look at the three players on his team who were most impacted by the trades:

Jay Ajayi to the Eagles:

-        I actually think this really hurts Ajayi’s value. He likely won’t play much this week, this being his first with a new team. After that he has a bye, so he’s pretty much useless for the next 2 weeks. After that his schedule goes: Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Rams, Giants. That’s not a very favorable schedule. He’s also on a pass-first team and will probably lose some work to Blount. All in all I think this hurts Lamone. He's currently RB23 and I don't think he'll end our season any higher than that. 

Kelvin Benjamin to the Bills:

-        While Ajayi gained an extra bye-week, Benjamin actually lost a bye – maybe the only WR in the NFL to NOT have a bye week this year. Honestly I feel like this is a good trade for Benjamin. Tyrod Taylor is a better QB than Cam Newton and Benjamin should be featured more than he was in Carolina. With Jordan Matthews and LeSean McCoy occupying defenders underneath, I think Benjamin can thrive in a deep-threat role for the Bills. It may not happen this week due to TNF, but I think this is a good thing for Benjamin. Kelvin is WR28 right now and I think he'll end up better than that. 

Pierre Garcon Gets a New QB:

-        The 49ers fleeced the Patriots and got Jimmy G for a second round pick. While he won’t start right away, he’ll definitely be playing by the end of Week 10’s game. That Beathard guy SUCKS and any upgrade at QB will help Garcon. Garoppolo to Garcon – that’s a mouthful.

INTERVIEW: PURE TAIGE (6-2)

1. In a sentence or two, tell me how you feel about your team…..

Do you remember how amazing the 1st half of Blow was? My season has been close to that.  My team needs to finish the season like Lando Calrissian did at the end of Return of the Jedi (Star Wars, you losers).

2. Now describe your team in 4 words or less. 

Need four letters: PURE

3. Tell me what you think about the Zeke suspension? Are you worried about your team if he ends up missing the 6 games?

Yea man, I feel like you're touching upon a much larger issue, so lets go there:  Goodell and the CBA.  What is your end goal when you start messing around with 2 super stars on two teams with prominent fan bases? Not to mention 2 of the most visible owners in the league...I say again......what is the end-game here?  Both Brady & Zeke have a lot in common when it comes to senseless persecution by the NFL's commissioner. 

As a fan of Brady living in Boston we're biased for sure - and the people of Dallas may or may not have been cringing every time they had to hear about the over hyped 'deflategate' - but one thing is certain..... they're being hit with the ridiculousness that us Patriots fans (is Kev a fan anymore?) dealt with for far too long. 

That being said, the NFL needs to get rid of this guy. Ratings are down. People in the majority of America care about the Dallas Cowboys because of their fantasy players, not just because it's football. When a player is getting suspended by the commissioner of the league without any charges being pursued by the police, that makes me wanna have him clown faced by a wookie.

OK, but to answer your question, it sucks. Doesn't seem like there's much hope left in this battle.  Planning is a huge aspect of the league, but losing a top pick to something like this blows. It makes you wonder if you would've been better off if the suspension already occurred.

(Editor's Note: Agreed on the Roger Goodell part here. These continual witch-hunts are a waste of time and are an embarassment to the league. Could you imagine something like this happening in ANY other sport? Even Vince McMahon couldn't make shit like this up for the WWF. Goodell is openly defying all of the laws of our legal system and has no issue with it because the CBA gave him ultimate power. Innocent until proven guilty - the most basic tenant of our legal system. He's a clown and a joke and the NFL will be better off when he's gone. As for Zeke - 100% agree it would have been better if he already served his suspension.)

4. Speaking of being worried, what do you think about Devonta Freeman? He’s been pretty disappointing lately.

Ya bad shoulders and a sandy vagina.

5. Personally the Commish believes you will win the league. Everyone else seems to think it will be Keetz. Do you think you can take him down?

Sure man, any week has its surprises.  Plenty of time for someone's key player to get an injury or for the commissioner to suspend them for using locker room talk against a female.  Depends how much the almighty commissioner wants to fall trap to the plague of pro feminism that runs amok in our society today.

(Editor's Note: Imagine how bad the pro-feminist/PC/BLM bull would be if this person was our president???)

6. Your fantasy providence in this league is legendary. The amount of pure Taige you’ve experienced is quite substantial. Of all the #blessed things to happen to you in this league, what is the most “PURE TAIGE”?

Trading for Tim Tebow and starting him in the playoffs leading to a championship

(Editor's Note: KEN THIS IS A WARNING. IF YOU TRADE WITH TIEG AT THE 11TH HOUR AGAIN WE ARE DRAFTING WHILE YOU'RE ON YOUR HONEYMOON AND YOU WILL GET EDDIE LACY AS YOUR FIRST ROUND AUTO-PICK NEXT YEAR).

7. Are you in any other leagues? If so, how are those going for you?  

In another league, on a 3 game winning streak after losing 4....and losing the #1 overall pick David Johnson (ouch).  Pair that with Zeke miraculously falling to me I thought this year was a lock; however, fantasy is not predictable like the projections make it seem.  Clawing my way back into the playoffs currently, lots of parity in the middle of this league.

8. Who do you think is the next league member to get engaged?

Keetz, 110%

(Editor’s Note: That’s 3 votes for Guy, 3 votes for Kev, 2 votes for Keetz and 1 vote for Ken. (Cumulative results)

9. What’s up next for the Pink Whales Foundation? New Years Party?

nah, going to a concert on NYE (stick figure) at HOB.  NYE is amateur hour at this point.  Probably a Kentucky Derby party.

10. Any final thoughts you would like to share with the league? The floor is yours…

I'd like to be lamp'in with Bryan Cranston at some point soon in life.  I'm heading out to California soon, he probably is living out there near Guy or Keetz or Elijah Wood.  Great actor, we've obviously all seen him in Seinfeld, The Infiltrator and Drive, plus maybe some other notable hits.  But recently he's been in the public eye due to his comments on the President, our President of the United States of America.  Proclaiming that he'd tell someone to 'fuck off' if they didn't want the President to succeed, *Our President. His point is so obvious though, but makes me wonder why so many people would rather see him (us, America) fail during his tenure.  So weird that this is our country right now:  we can't believe the news, what is real anymore?  Easy to turn a blind eye until Lamon exposes you to some fucking crazy shit MAN.

On another note, the plant based diet, HOLY SHIT.  Ya gotta do it, 5 weeks in at this point, solid results and good food.  Watch 'what the health' then talk to me.