WEEK 2 - PART 2 — Protector Of The League

Daddy’s Little Gurl (1-1):

Statement: Dak Prescott will finish as a top 5 fantasy QB and in doing so, keep Aaron Rogers on Ken’s bench all year long.

Data: Dak is currently QB2 and is averaging 38 points per week to start the season. He exploded in Week 1 with 43 points and followed that up with a 34 point performance in Week 2. The Cowboys offense has looked unstoppable, seeing big performances from Amari Cooper, Michael Gallup and Zeke Elliott. Even Jason Witten is getting into the mix with 2 TDs in 2 games. Their new offensive coordinator Kellen Moore has unlocked this offense’s potential and will continue to be creative with their skill players. Dak is currently on pace for 5,292 passing yards, 56 TDs, 8 INTs and over 600 rushing yards.

Verdict: I have to say that this is real news on both accounts. The Cowboys offense appears to be the Rams of this season and Dak has put up monster numbers. Having the best o-line in football and a slew of good weapons will do that. Dak’s floor is really high and he’ll put up some rushing TDs to boost his totals. I also think Rogers may be done as an elite fantasy QB. He’s QB22 in our league and hasn’t topped 17 points in either game this season. The Packers offense looks more run-heavy than ever and their defense is better than it’s been maybe ever during Rodgers career. Dakky’s Little Gurl – new team name?

The King of the NorthShore (1-1):

Statement: JuJu Smith-Schuster is going to be a bust.

Data: Through 2 weeks JuJu has scored just 21.7 fantasy points and is yet to score a TD. He’s WR35 as of today. The concerns that he wouldn’t be effective as a #1 WR have proven to be true and the whole Steelers offense is struggling without Antonio Brown. The Steelers have only scored 29 points total through 2 games and guess what? Their #1 QB is gone for the season.

Verdict: I’ll say this is fake news and JuJu will not be a bust. As with George Kittle, his point totals are skewed by the fact he hasn’t scored a TD yet. If you give him 1 TD, then he jumps from WR35 to WR25 which is a huge difference from just one play. He’s also getting the volume you like to see from a #1 WR: he’s currently on pace for nearly 90 catches and 1,300 yards. He probably won’t repeat the 111-1,426-7 line from last year, but he’ll be fine.

The Permian Panthers (2-0):

Statement: Joe Mixon sucks.

Data: Mixon has been absolutely brutal to start the year and is currently RB FIFTY FIVE (55) in our scoring. On the full list of scoring leaders at RB, you need to navigate to the second page just to find his sorry ass. He scored 3.9 points in week 1 and 6.4 in week 2. On the season he’s got a Jeremy Hill-like 17 rushes for 27 yards which is fitting because Hill was also on the sorry ass Bengals. You think that’s bad? How about 17 total yards on 5 catches. That’s just unfathomably bad. Speaking of bad, the Bengals have the worst offensive line in the league. To top if off these 2 games came against the 49ers and the Bills… two teams no one is sitting their stars against.

Verdict: You all know where this is going… this is absolutely 100% factual news. Late in the draft season I started listening to podcasts/watching youtube videos by a guy named Chris Harris. He used to be on ESPN, but he’s kinda doing his own thing now. His material is good (decent) and I (used to) like it because he focuses more on the game film and less on the results. He’s a scout/talent evaluator by nature and for a minute there I was buying into it. This Chris Harris schmuck loved Joe Mixon and I was convinced – convinced enough to take him with my first pick. What a fucking disaster, I may be the first person to sit my first round pick in a matchup this season.

Return of the Mack (2-0):

Statement: Sony Michel will go the way of Stevan Ridley in the Pats offense. Reminder: that’s not a good thing.

Data: Through 2 weeks, Michel is averaging 2.75 yards per carry. Despite logging 36 totes, he’s still failed to eclipse 100 yards rushing. His passing game usage is nonexistent as well – 0 catches on 0 targets through 2 weeks. He’s RB32 on the season while James White is RB29 and Rex Burkhead is RB31. Sony did punch in a short TD last week, but he also lost a fumble. We all remember what fumbles did to Ridley’s career…..

Verdict: Sadly for Michel owners this is real news. I don’t think Michel will be quite this bad, but I also don’t believe he’ll sniff the top 20 of RB scoring this year. He looked terrible in Week 1 and didn’t look a whole lot better in Week 2. The Patriots always use multiple RBs and both White and Burkhead have been much more effective with their touches so far. James Develin will vulture a few TDs here and there and Branden Bolden randomly gets work as well. Not to mention they have plenty of options in the passing game. Oh yeah – we’ve also lost 3/5 of our offensive line to injury. Sony Michel stock is plummeting right now.

Butt Kicker Dot Com (2-0):

Statement: Julio Jones is going to set a career high in receiving TDs.

Data: We’ll start with this – he already has 3 which puts him on pace for 24 this season. That would break the current record of 23 set by Randy Moss in the season that shall not be named. That would also make him just the 3rd player in NFL history to score more than 20 receiving TDs in a season. Last but not least, he’s already 30% of the way there. His career high in TDs is the 10 he had back in 2012.

Verdict: We’ll end on a positive – this is not fake news. First of all, there are about 5 years of regression coming his way. In the 5 seasons from 2014-2018, Julio averaged 105 catches for 1,600 yards (!!!). Those numbers are outrageous. Despite the lofty receiving totals, he averaged only 6 TDs per season. Speaking of outrageous, that number is outrageously low for how many receptions and yards he’s had. There are plenty of “touchdowns per target” stats which would prove this, but I think I made my point. All he needs to do is score 1 TD every other game to match his career high of 10. At this pace he’s going to blow by it.