GW Bush League - Week 12 (Part 2) — Protector Of The League

THE FOURNETTEUATE FEW: 6-6

Question 1: Is Ken really a 4-6 team? He’s on pace to finish at 5-8, so I guess that’s the better question. Is he really a 5-8 team? I don’t think so. I think he finishes better than 5-8.

ANSWER: No, Ken is better than a 5-8 team. At worst he’ll finish 6-7 and at best he’ll finish 7-6. His team is on a ROLL right now after winning 3 in a row and 5 of their last 8. We’re going streaking.

Question 2: Going with the above – can Ken make a run to the playoffs? Holy shit, Ken’s gonna make the playoffs.

ANSWER: Yes, Ken can make a run to the playoffs. Ken has all but clinched at this point, so he’s gotta be feeling good about himself. Meanwhile I hate my life because Ken took my fucking playoff spot. I’ll get to this later, but Ken’s fournettuate streak has been a result of my unfournettuate bad luck.

Question 3: What can we expect out of Leonard Fournette going forward?

ANSWER: Fournette was coming off a slump when I wrote this. He had missed two games with injury/suspension and scored 9 points in his week 10 matchup. He immediately squashed any fears by putting up 21.4 in Week 11. Unfortunately Fournette came crashing back down to earth like the shit meteor in Joe Dirt – 8 points in Week 12.

Going forward I think we can expect some more of the same – ups and downs. He’ll tear it up this week vs. the Colts, but will likely struggle vs. the Seahawks in Week 14. Regardless I’d be pumped to have him for Week 13, he should easily put up 25 vs the Colts.

JABAAL PAP SHMEARD: 7-5

Question 1: Will Alvin Kamara really finish as a top 10 RB this year? This is looking like the free agent pick up of the year.

ANSWER: Yes, he absolutely will. Since I wrote that Kamara has scored 61 fantasy points in two games. He’s taken 13 carries for 129 yards and a TD, while catching 12 passes for 175 yards and two TDs. Over three hundred yards and three TDs in two games……ludicrous. Kamara stands as RB4 right now and I honestly think he will finish in the top 3. The only players above him are Kareem Hunt (9 points), LeVeon Bell (40 points) and Todd Gurley (57 points). He still has 5 games to go, so anything could happen. Ultimately I think he’ll finish #3 behind Gurley and Bell – those two just have such big leads on him. That being said, I think he’ll be the #1 RB from here on out.

Question 2: Can Lamone overcome his terrible WR group?

ANSWER: I wrote this in week 10, when Lamone had Kelvin Benjamin and Cooper Kupp as his starting WRs. It was atrocious and had been holding him back. He made a few free agent pickups, but it was still a weakness…… or so I thought. In week 12 Lamone started Jamison Crowder and Robbie Anderson against me. The result was laughable. Two weeks after I shit on his WRs, his two waiver wire adds combine to put up 59 points against me. That’s my season in a nutshell.

Question 3: How will Jay Ajayi do with the Eagles? He’ll probably be a bum the rest of the year.

ANSWER: Not much to say here, Ajayi has been a bum. He’s only received 12 carries in the last two games (??!??!?!) and has combined for 17 fantasy points. The Eagles have no interest in giving him a large workload, he hasn’t grasped the playbook, or they’re just saving him for the playoffs. For whatever reason Jay Ajayi is not startable right now. It’s baffling how Lamone had Ajayi when he was the complete horse-shoe in the ass surprise of 2016 and he now has the horse-shoe in the ass surprise of 2017 on his team (Kamara). I guess all those years of bad luck are regressing to the mean.

Bud Light n the Dilly Dilly’s: (7-5)

Question 1: Does Dylan have the best WR group in our league?

ANSWER: I don’t know, you tell me if this sounds good. Julio Jones is WR3, DeAndre Hopkins is WR2, Davante Adams is WR11 and Devin Funchess is WR19. AKA Dylan has four of the top 20 WRs and 3 of the top 12. Does anyone else come close?

Tieg has 3 in the top 16, but no one else has more than 2 in the top 12. So..... Dylan has the best WR group in our league.

Question 2: How many touchdowns will Jordan Howard end up with? He’s got 4 on the year, which seems kinda bad (on pace for about 8).

ANSWER: I said he was on pace for 8, so let’s see what he’s on pace for now. He scored in Week 11, but was shut out (and had a horrible game) in Week 12. All in all he’s got 5 touchdowns in 11 games. For a 16 game schedule that puts him on pace for 7.3. Will he score more than 7 touchdowns? I don’t really think so. He has an easy matchup this week, but his remaining schedule is pretty brutal. Unless he has a multiple TD game somewhere I don’t see him finishing with more than 7 TDs.

Question 3: Is Evan Engram the rookie of the year? For non-RBs I think he is.

ANSWER: Sadly Evan Engram has been booty since I wrote this. He’s put up a combined 4.7 fantasy points the last two weeks on 4 catches for 27 yards. To make matters worse, the Giants just benched Eli Manning (LOL) and he’ll be catching passes from Geno Smith. So Engram’s outlook is bad, but which rookies could challenge him? (Non RBs). Really it’s just Cooper Kupp, who could give him a run for his money. It’ll be interesting to see how the rest of Engram’s season plays out.

LeveonStuffed Kens TacoBell: 8-4

(Note: I interviewed Bob D this week so there were no questions. I’ll just make up a few questions as of now instead.)

Question 1: Le’Veon Bell hasn’t scored a TD since Week 8. Any cause for concern?

ANSWER: Absolutely positively NOT. Despite not scoring a TD in those three games (one bye), Bell has still combined for 62.5 fantasy points (avg of 21). But how? As always - volume. It’s actually ridiculous. In those three games, Bell has received 58 carries and 26 receptions. That’s nearly 20 carries and 9 catches PER GAME. Holy shit that is nuts.

Question 2: When will Chris Hogan and Robert Woods come back? Hogan hasn’t played since Week 8 when he was injured. Robert Woods didn’t play last week and will miss this week as well. In the mean-time, Robby D might have to start TY Hilton as WR2. That doesn’t sound that bad on the surface, but take a look at this: 5, 7, 27, 5, 23, 2, 4, 2, 34, 3, 2. Those are TY Hilton’s game scores for the season. Do you really want to take the chance that you might hit big? Based on numbers, there’s a 70% chance or better that he does absolutely nothing.

ANSWER: The timetable on Robert Woods was “a couple of weeks”, so he won’t be playing until at least Week 14. He also may not be back for Week 15, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. As for Hogan, we legitimately have heard nothing. A quick Lougle search shows that there is “no return date in sight” for Hogan. That’s not good. So Robby D may have a sticky situation on his hands at WR - pun intended. Luckily for him he has 2 players for the price of one in LeVeon Bell. Seriously, how many other WRs have had 26 catches the last 3 weeks? Maybe 3?

Question 3: Is Robby D single-handedly responsible for ruining my season?

ANSWER: That seems excessive, but it’s not. First let’s look at our H2H matchups. Robby D has beat me twice this year by scores of 120-94 and 127-111. That’s 2 of my 6 losses. While his team shows up against me every time, my team consistently shits the bed against him. That 94 is the 3rd lowest score I put up this year and the 111 ranks in the bottom 6 as well.

The other thing is just the timing. In Week 1, Robby D put up 70 against Dylan. The very next week he puts up 120 against me. Really? More recently, he put up 127 against me. The very next week he put up 98 against Ken. How convenient. As you all know, I’m competing directly against Dylan and Ken for playoff spots – and currently losing. Maybe this is some giant cosmic FUCK YOU from the fantasy football gods for the year Robby D was out of the league, maybe not. Either way he’s probably the #1 person responsible for my demise. (The 3 point loss to Tieg cuz of Aaron Fucking Jones is #2. FUCK AARON JONES).

MIXONS HERE HYDE UR GURLEY: 11-1

Question 1: Does anyone aside from Keetz have a chance to win the title this year? Based on his 9-1 record, it doesn’t seem like it. Just for fun I’ll propose two teams that could beat him.

The first is Robby D – you can never count out any team that has Leveon. The other team that has a chance is Dylan. His RBs, WRs and TEs are stacked and he’s got Stafford at QB. Overall I think those are the only two teams who could challenge Keetz.

ANSWER: As of now, it’s the same two teams. Robby D will always have a chance because of LeVeon Bell. He’s got a floor of 17 points and he’s due for some positive TD regression (guarantee he scores this week). The rest of his team is solid as well. Dylan on the other hand is a stacked team. He could definitely challenge Keetz. Overall it seems those will be the top 3 teams.

Question 2: Can Mike Evans turn it around? I’ll just come out and say it – he’s been disappointing this year (there’s an “I’ll just come out and say it” joke in here somewhere). The deck is stacked against him, but maybe talent will prevail.

ANSWER: As of now he hasn’t and it caused me to miss the playoffs in one league. Over the last two weeks, Evans has scored 11.7 and 10.8 points. In the same time he has just 11 receptions for 170 yards. In two weeks, Evans has 11 receptions. LeVeon Bell had 12 receptions LAST WEEK ALONE. WTF. The one silver lining is that Jameis Winston should come back this week. Can he get Mike Evans back on track? We’ll see.

Question 3: Speaking of WR busts, let’s gripe about Keenan Allen. Is he gonna turn it around?

ANSWER: Unlike Mike Evans, Keenan Allen has been on fire the last two weeks. In two games vs. the Bills and Cowboys, Allen has 23 catches for 330 plus yards and 3 TDs. Allen has 23 catches the last two weeks……guess how many LeVeon Bell has…..21……FML. Anyways it appears as though Allen has finally turned the corner. The targets are there and the Chargers are on a roll. He’s got a very favorable schedule coming up and he’ll be a big part of Keetz’ title run.